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This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License
Peach Doesn’t Drive Very Fast
And Peach also drives off the track. A lot.
We got Mario Kart Wii today, and my husband is very good at it, and I still suck! Even though now I get a steering wheel instead of that stupid joystick like the Nintendo used to have. Peach consistently came in 12th place (out of 12) tonight. I think she needs to practice her driving.
One time, when we were childless and just married, we had a Super Nintendo. We rented Mario Kart from Blockbuster for the weekend and played it for hours. I drove into walls, ran into banana peels, and fell off of cliffs. My husband circled the track like a Professional Race Car Driver. I never made it to the podium. Not even once. He even drove the car using his left hand only (he’s a righty), and sans glasses (he’s near sighted), and HE STILL WON!!! And I still drove into walls, ran into banana peels and fell off of cliffs.
There is hope for me. Right?
Dear FedEx Home Delivery Man
Dear FedEx Home Delivery Man,
When in the heck are you going to be delivering my package from Louis Vuitton? You made your first attempt on Thursday, your second attempt on Friday, and now it seems that the package as vanished into thin air. I’ve been told that it’s on the truck for delivery, that you’ll make a third delivery attempt, and that it’ll be here before 8 p.m., yet YOU NEVER SHOW UP!!!!! The tracking number on www.fedex.com has no new tracking information since Friday, May 23rd.
Seriously dude, that handbag is totally not your style. And if you break the zipper, I WILL BE LIVID.
Sincerely,
Kim
Wordless Wednesday: Ice Cream?
Waiting
It seems that all I’ve been doing lately is waiting.
Waiting for the my grades to get posted online for the Human Resources class I completed (I got an A).
Waiting for my daughter to come home from swimming in the neighbors pool (she did come home, about 7 hours after she left).
Waiting for Louis Vuitton to fix the zipper on my handbag that I bought over 15 years ago using my tax return money to purchase (a check that I waited FOR.EVER to receive in the mail). Waiting for FedEx Home Delivery to deliver my repaired handbag so I can go on with my life knowing that the contents of my purse are securely zippered inside. I waited ALL DAY on Saturday for them to deliver it, after missing them on Thursday and Friday, it wasn’t on the truck for some unknown reason.
And today I’m waiting for the sprinkler people to come out and turn on my sprinklers so that I can water my grass — and my flowerbeds, which I’m waiting for my husband to design so that we can actually have flowerbeds.
I’m also waiting for summer. We got a peek at it yesterday when it was 90 degrees out, but today, it’s back down to 53.
I’m waiting for June 13th because we are going to Door County for a short getaway to one of my favorite places ever.
I’m waiting for August 19th, which is the LAST day of my very last graduate class that I’m registered for for my Master’s in Business Administration. I still have two classes to take after that, and the capstone, but I’m WAITING until after Christmas, I think.
And I’m waiting for September because then I’m going to DISNEY WORLD!!!!
That’s a lot of things to wait for. What are you waiting for?
Oh, and the sprinkler people are here, so now I’m waiting to see if the new play set is smack dab on top of a sprinkler head. What are the chances?
Wingdings
We were at dinner the other night at Pizzeria Piccola, where Zoe always takes a handful of crayons and a sheet of paper and colors while we wait for our pizza to be served. On this night she wrote my name, not M O M, but it was a picture of an owl, then a squiggly loopy line thingy, and then another owl. As all parents can attest to, there are times your child will hold up a picture, pride beaming in there face, and you have to quick try to figure out what it is, and the whole time you can’t let it show on your face that you do not know what it is.
Zoe pointed out: “Mom, I wrote your name.”
“In what, Wingdings?” I asked, thinking to myself, when has she ever seen the Wingding font?
After much explanation, and then pulling out a book from her shelf at home, it turns out that she was writing in hieroglyphics.
Let me repeat that: My seven year old daughter, wrote my name in hieroglyphics, from memory, out of a book she studied a month ago.
HIEROGLYPHICS.
They fake cleaned my house!
About six weeks ago I hired Merry Maids to come and clean my home. They are to come every other week, and while I’d love for them to come every week, I simply can not afford it. Their sales person came out to my home, and walked my husband and I through how the cleaning would be done, what it included, what we could expect, and how much it would cost us. We signed up right then and there.
The first cleaning was amazing. AMAZING! They knocked our socks off. The second cleaning was pretty good, but they missed a few things, like the laundry room, the bay window, all the window sills, and the faceplates of the electrical outlets, something they said would be done. Also, every week they’d choose two rooms that they’d pay extra special attention to, those rooms get deep cleaned and everything is moved out of the way, cleaned under, and then moved back. During my second cleaning the master bathroom and master bedroom were the rooms that were to get the special attention. It was in my opinion that while they were clean, they were NOT given special attention at all. The fact that I found things underneath the nightstands and dressers told me that they didn’t move a single thing, nor did then even stick a vacuum hose under them.
My third cleaning was today, and let me tell you, I’m so disappointed. My husband left the house at noon and told me that Merry Maids had just arrived. I got home alittle before 1 p.m. and circled the block because I saw they were just leaving. ONE HOUR. They were here for ONE HOUR and folks, it showed. My seven year old could have cleaned better than they did. The utility room was not even swept, there was cat liter on the floor and under the throw rug; the bathroom floors were not washed, nor was the master bathroom floor even swept (and the reason I know this is because my shoulder length hair was ALL over the floor!); the bathroom countertops were not even wiped down, and the sinks were rinsed at best; my sliding glass doors were not cleaned; and the dressers were dusted ONE handlength in on the tops, leaving a very nice line of dust. I also ran my Dyson through the house and filled the canister 1/4 of the way. Did they even vacuum? I doubt it.
I called and complained. Three times actually. They aren’t charging me for today’s visit, and they shouldn’t because I really think they fake cleaned my house.
What did they do? Well, I know they did wipe down my end tables and my coffee table in the living room because there was an oily finish to the them when I walked in, and they took out the trash, but beyond that I have no clue.
I’m giving them one more chance to get it right, and if they don’t, they’ll be fired. At that point, I’ll be looking for someone else to come in and clean my house. For REAL. Can you recommend a good cleaner?
Some may say that I’m being too picky. I disagree. If you sell me a service and tell me that you’ll pick up every single thing I own, wipe it down, then wipe down the surface it’s sitting on, you had better do it — because that’s what I expect.
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